Tears, Promises and Miracles…
“I am the author so
you have to let me write the book.
I am the author and the pages are being
prepared, the outline is being drafted, the chapters are being arranged, and
the binding is being sealed.”
The Lord gave me those words here
at the close of 2012, which was the greatest year of my life. If you were to
look at my life and knew all of the tears I had cried, you would hardly think
this was the best year of my life. Why was it the best year of my life? It was
because it was the year I fell in love with Jesus. No longer am I unto myself
but now I am a servant of the King.
In January of 2012 I radically
threw my life on the altar of the Lord. See He had redeemed me from my life of
sin, despair, and hopelessness. It was then that I actually felt my life change
like it had never done before in the past. I was raised in church, I went to a
Christian school and I was a Bible school graduate. I had done all the right
things but yet I fell away in disappointment and bitterness. I asked the Lord,
“Why Lord did I fall away? I did everything unto you.” He said you did it unto
my but you forgot to look at me. I had mistakenly forgotten to look at him and
to seek him first in all things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God
So then my journey began in March
when I resigned my job. I traveled the country. This was always a desire to see
the country and visit all my dear friends. This traveling began in June 2012.
It was at the very first service with Bro. Jerry Jones preached about: two
guards, two chains, and a warden. I literally felt the chains of oppression
removed from my life. God showed up when I needed him most! He will never leave
you or forsake you. These very words “I will never
leave you or forsake you” have been my very motto of my life this past year. It
was one of the first promises that God gave me. I began the year in tears and I
let those tears change me. When I was open to the voice of the Lord then he
began to share his promises with me. I am not worthy of his love but he loved
me no matter what!
The travels led me from state to
state and I was blessed to attend 7 camp meetings. How amazing is that? I was
able to spend a whole year listening to the word of God. It was life altering.
Would I travel all over again? You betcha! It was on this trail of tears that I
found my faith in God. I had always loved the Lord but this was finding me in
love with the Lord. There is a huge difference between loving someone and being
in love with someone. I had spent my whole life never feeling this kind of
love. It was the love of a redeemed soul.
When I came home from my travels
is when I truly changed. No longer was I unto myself. It was now not about me
or my silly wants or desires. There was a literal shift in the spirit. I can
almost tell you the day. It was the day after I came home. I was praying and
the desire for souls came on me so strong; stronger then it ever had in my
life! I went to the church for weeks praying and the burden would not lift. But
then it began to take form. God began to show me his plan for my life.
I met a person who changed me
forever. The best person I have ever met: A person that I will never be able to
measure up to no matter how much I would have tried. But the Lord showed me
that I had my own set of gifts to help the Homeless ministry and that I did not
have to do all the same things. I would be an asset to the ministry and I would
balance them. My strengths would offset the weaknesses and vice versa. I began
reading the gospels every day and reading the blogs of the one who changed my
life. It was life changing and inspiring! For now I know what I was finally
meant to do with my life. I was to be a servant to the people just as Jesus
came to serve so was I to serve.
Serving in LVOE is the love of
Jesus. LVOE is a love that is not like any other love and is spelled this way
to distinguish the difference of God’s love. This is the motto of Common Ground
a mission in Shreveport , LA
I am to love those in need
whether you I am loved in return. They may never come to Jesus and I might not
ever know their names. But I accept the call of the great command of the Lord.
Master,
which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him,
Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and
with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like
unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments
hang all the law and the prophets. Matthew 22:36-40
I accepted the call after the
best year of my life. This was year that was met with a trail of tears:
1) “Lord change me don’t leave me
in my sin”
2) “Lord give me a burden for
souls”
3) “Lord help me through the fire”
The fire came in like a flood
when I accepted the call. Which is what happens to those who are servants of
the Lord most high! The floods of fire would have made most people run for the
hills. But see I had a whole year of promises along my trail of tears. No
longer did I have to do it alone. I heard the phrase this year that caught my
attention: “Why are you running from the Lord? He will only love you if he
catches you!” I don’t know about you but my friend if you are running this
really is the truth. Will there trials? Will you have pain? Yes and yes but
there will be such peace and joy as you throw yourself at the master’s feet. 
If you never have adversity you
will never change. If there is no pain you will never have any growth
spiritually. Adversity shapes us and makes us over. It humbles us and brings us
to our knees. I can honestly say, “Lord thank you for my adversity!” My mother
said how could this be your best year? When you have faced so much pain? People
have turned their back on you, you have been rejected more times than you can
count, and you have lost people you loved.
But you see my sweet friends I
have gained everything. I may have lost it all but the Lord will return to me more
than what I have lost. I have prayed for a double portion from the Lord and he
will never leave me or forsake me. The Lord only wants the best for me!
For I know the thoughts that I
think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to
give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray
unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when
ye shall search for me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13
As I ended the year the Lord spoke to me and told me that
this year was a year of miracles in my life. In 2012 it was a year of promises
and now I look forward to miracles in 2013. It will be only the Lord who makes
it happen. On December 31st I was reminded that he is faithful. I
should have received a speeding ticket. I was praying on my way to the hospital
to visit friends with a sick son. But the Lord intervened and I didn’t even
receive a warning. It spoke to me in a mighty way. I deserved the ticket
because I was speeding I didn’t deserve mercy but I received it anyways. This
is just like the Lord to show me that is who He is: I don’t deserve his mercy
and I will fail him often but He will not punish me for my shortcomings. It is
his infinite mercy. He loves us no matter what we do and He makes a way of
escape when there seems like no way of escape.
This year will be a year of miracles. I sat at church before
communion and foot washing and wrote down as many promises from the last year
as possible. I am claiming those miracles! I am also making it my life to be a
servant to all who need me. I have already begun giving my time, money and
energy. Now I hope to give his LVOE to all I meet. My desire is to be a willing
servant and vessel unto the mighty master and savior.
Whether I am an encourager, a homeless advocate, feeding the poor, and praying
for friends and loved ones. No longer can I be an island unto myself. I am
accountable to the LVOE of the Lord and to all that need me.
Will you accept my challenge? Will you spend every day
impacting the lives around you? Will you put your hands to working for the
Kingdom? This is the great command to love and to serve. It is what Jesus came
to do. He served with his life and died for us in LVOE! I am ready for my
miracles!
My challenges for
2012 in Recap:
Are you raw oak or a varnished deck?
Are you trapped going up or down?
To be or not to be that is the question?
Are you full time or part time?
Will you accept the great responsibility?
Will you give yourself away?
Who are you influencing?
Will you give your dreams back to the Lord?
Will you move beyond your personal masquerade ball?
Have you misplaced your invitation?
Will you let him prepare your heart?
Will you step out beyond the glass?
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