Made for the Desert - Raising a Red Banner for Me!

Made for the Desert - Raising a Red Banner for Me

It isn’t easy being in the desert alone. You want to ask the question of the Lord, why? It is a natural question to ask because the desert is a dry and lonely place and it often is so foreign that you might feel lost and undone. So, what is the purpose? To be honest sometimes I think I know and then sometimes, I question if, I will ever move out of the desert. We are going to explore some reasons why we are in the desert together for, I too am here with you in my own desert. 

The first thing I know is that, God is in control. He knows exactly why you are where you are, and He is perfecting you in it. So how will you respond to your desert? Will you get bitter or better? Will you blame God, or will you trust Him? Will you ask Him to remove you from the desert, or will you trust Him to lead you through the entire process?

These are some hard questions and we often default to the first response, rather than the correct response. It is hard to be stretched. It is hard to trust. It is hard to be in a new place. It is hard to not ask, why? So, what are we to truly do in our desert?

A few months ago, God gave me a word and told me He was my red banner. What could this mean Lord? Honestly it didn’t make much sense to me until I began to study it out. In one place a study showed that there were different colors of banners and they were symbolic of different things. Such as a green banner could symbolize healing. But a red banner, (the lord is my banner) is meant to be that we are covered by the blood of Jesus.

There is only one mention of Jehovah-Nissi (The Lord is my banner) Exodus 17:15. This is when Moses was in the wilderness that he built an altar unto the Lord. He called it the Lord is my banner. But the key point is He built an altar in his dry and lonesome place. The second thing we must do is, we must build an altar in our weakest place, and it is there that God can begin to shape us and shift us for His glory. It was his dry and lonesome place but here the Lord met Moses and it is there that the Lord will meet you too!

The third thing we need to know is, we are in a spiritual battle and we wrestle not against flesh and blood Ephesians 6:12-13. It is important to know that we must put on the whole armor of God in order to even stand in the fight. When we are in battle, He is our red banner. He is our covering and we are covered by the blood of Jesus when we fight and war in the spirit, if we put on our armor and let Him fight for us in the battle. Yet, we must go to war on our altar in our desert for Him to activate, His banner in our lives.

We have a challenge in this desert to more than we have done before, to pray harder than we have before, and most of all to wait in that desert. When we wait on the Lord and trust Him, He will lead us to the water. What is a banner really? It is a form of victory! It is God raising a standard above our enemies! Psalms 18:48 Song of Solomon 2:4

The fourth thing we need to know is that God is fighting for us! A banner is a standard which the lord raises up and causes the enemy to flee! It literally means he makes a way of escape! Just as in battle flags or banners are raised to symbolize surrender or victory! Isaiah 59:19 The red banner is the blood of Jesus being applied to your life, when you make an altar in your desert the lord is fighting for you. He is raising a standard and the enemy must flee! He cannot stand where the lord is standing, Ephesians 5:10-20 when you’ve done all to stand the lord fights the battle. He places his banner upon your life and nothing the enemy does or says cannot make it come to pass in your life. When the lord raises up a standard, He is our banner, He is our Jehovah-Nissi in the wilderness and He becomes our banner for victory!

In conclusion: we must 1) trust God and know that He is in control, 2) pray in our desert 3) put on the armor of God 4) know that God is fighting for us and that He is our banner.

We can’t walk this walk alone. We can’t do it without waking with the Lord and trusting his plan. We must be willing to pray, “not my will but thy will be done.” Then we actually have to mean it! We must die daily on the altar, the altar of repentance, the altar in our desert, the altar of self-will, and the altar of dying out to our own plans. This is hard for a fixer like me. I see something and I have a plan in motion in my mind. This is good sometimes, but it is not always God’s will for my life.

A few things I know about God’s will. It doesn’t change according to my emotions. It doesn’t change daily. It is about being rooted and planted. God’s will line up with the Word of God. It is a life submitted to authority. It is a life, living and serving, while doing everything you do as unto the Lord. In order to operate in God’s will, you must be faithful, consistent, prayerful, will to take correction, and to have a teachable spirit. These are just some things I have gleaned along the way. It is challenging and the enemy will fight you about having the right attitude and being submitted to authority. In order to have authority and you have to be under authority.

Don’t be discouraged in your desert! Just know that if you are there, God trusts you to be there! He knows where you are, and He has a perfect plan! God knows the right timing to take you from your desert, just keep doing what you’re doing for the Lord, and know that God’s got this! We were made to be in the desert to perfect us and He raises a banner to protect us in that fight!

“When you walk, I am the ground beneath your feet, when you’re weary, I am your strong tower, when you can’t see the way I am your light. I know right where you’re at and I have not forgotten you, I have not overlooked you, but rather I have kept you. I am not mad at you and I am not punishing you but rather I am preparing you. I have set you aside and hidden you because you are my precious treasure. I am preparing you like Esther for greatness and in that there is a season of preparation. She was anointed but she was hidden. She was prepared but she was alone, but you are not alone for I the lord God go with you wherever you go.”

A Marriage for a Lifetime!

Are you ready to embark on a journey? Have you ever wondered how it is supposed to work? What does the bible have to say about a biblical marriage? And is it really that important? These are the questions I am going to attempt to answer in this blog. I have stewed on this subject for over a year. I have studied it in the Word and have had God give me insight into His perfect plan for marriage. So come take a walk with me as we begin our story of a young woman named Rebekah.

The story of Isaac and Rebekah is a familiar story to most. I want to emphasize that although I am going to lay out a biblical marriage blueprint for us in the physical it is also a typology of our marriage to God as the bride of Christ. Every reflection of marriage and even the reason why God made marriage is so that we could understand what it means to be married to God. I will touch on that some but truly I want to lay out a blueprint of Gods plan for our lives.

There are so many things going on in today’s society and the media. But, how do we as single Christians find our Isaac or Rebekah? With the alarming divorce rate in and out of the church, should we even bother looking? I am sure this is how Rebekah felt so long ago.

1) A servant’s heart

And the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master, and sware to him concerning that matter…And he said O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. Genesis 24:9,12

Man: The servant of Abraham is a type and shadow of the man today who is serving his master (Jesus). He prayed to God and asked God to show him who Isaac’s wife would be just as a man of God will pray and ask God to show him who his wife is today. He will be a servant of the Lord. (As most of us do not have a manservant to go and find us a wife.)

Here we can also note that the man is the one who went in search of his bride. Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22 Ladies as much as we might want to pursue a husband it just isn’t in the plan of God. We have to let them find us! This is ever a hard lesson to learn and sadly most do not. In a world where roles are reversed and identities are confused this is hard to have faith that the man will actually find us. Reminds me of a quote I saw one time, “My knight isn’t on a horse, he’s lost in the woods on a turtle.” Well he may be “lost” but it’s not our job to find him. We can only pursue him in prayer. God will reward you but you will have to wait for the promise.

He is a praying man! He will also pursue you in prayer! If he isn’t praying for you now, why would you waste your time on a façade of a promise?

And he said O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water: And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master. Genesis 24:12-14

Woman: A woman must also be a servant like Rebekah was on that day. How many days had she willingly gone to the well to draw water? I am sure she was tired after the long walk in the desert that day. It was hard work to lift the water jug down into the well. I wonder how often she thought that God had forgotten her. I don’t think there is a single woman alive in church who hasn’t thought this before. We see here that she served and her decision to serve a stranger opened the door to her heart’s desire.

And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up. And the servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher. And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and gave him drink. And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also, until they have done drinking. And she hasted, and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels. Genesis 24:16-20

If you are lacking direction in your life and you don’t know how God will ever bring you your mate, I implore you to choose to be a servant. Be a servant on your job. Be a servant at your church. Be a servant to your pastor. Be a servant to your family. Be a servant to your community. The key to God opening doors in your life is to be a willing servant. Serve with no expectation of recognition. Serve with a heart of worship. Serve the least of the Kingdom in love. Don’t serve with the idea of if I serve God will bring me my man! No, a servant serves and because they serve they are rewarded not because it’s their duty but because it is in their heart to help others.

2) A Praying Man and Woman

There are two times the servant prays in this story. He prays for guidance and then he worships God for answering his prayer.

And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in? And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor. She said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in. And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the Lord. Genesis 24:23-26

Ladies~ your husband is a prayer warrior! He is seeking God for you hand in marriage! He is worshipping at home and he is worshipping in church. He is putting God first in all He does. He is seeking to honor you with his attentions. His purpose is to lead you closer to Jesus. He is not seeking you in secret. He is not asking you to compromise your morals or your virtue. He is looking to provide you with the very best he has to offer! Do not be fooled by those who are wolves in sheep’s clothing. Your husband will be upfront and clear with his intentions. He will have sought godly council from his leaders and have fasted and prayed.

Men~ your wife will have the fruit of the spirit and be adorned in godly jewels. The servant of the Lord will have placed them upon her life. She will be a testament of beauty and grace.

And it came to pass, when he saw the earring and bracelets upon his sister's hands, and when he heard the words of Rebekah his sister, saying, Thus spake the man unto me; that he came unto the man; and, behold, he stood by the camels at the well. Genesis 24:30

She will have the gifts of the spirit operating in her life. She will be a prayer warrior. She will be evident of who she is in God and she will be a testament of God working in her life. She will be set apart seeking God first in her life, a servant seeking to please even the lowliest of strangers.

3) The Blessings of Counsel

Both will seek godly counsel. The man will make his intentions known. The woman will tell her family and loved ones and seek approval. It can never be the will of God to not include your pastor, your family, and loved ones in your life’s decision. This will bring the blessings of the Lord on your life. You will begin life together the right way and not in shame. There is no hurry! You don’t have to run away together and elope. You don’t have to marry in secret! The blessing of your family and church family is the best plan. I know there are circumstances that don’t allow this and there are always situations of unsaved family not welcoming your marriage but the part you have to play is including them even if in your circumstance they don’t like your proposed spouse. The point is you asked for the blessing and you did your due diligence to go through all the right channels.

And now if ye will deal kindly and truly with my master, tell me: and if not, tell me; that I may turn to the right hand, or to the left. Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, The thing proceedeth from the Lord: we cannot speak unto thee bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before thee, take her, and go, and let her be thy master's son's wife, as the Lord hath spoken. Genesis 24:49-51

Rebekah was a blessing as she went and followed her husband. The woman goes to the man! I know this point might not be popular but it’s a valid point. The woman should always follow the man. When it comes to, where do we live? Whose church do we go to? Which state should we live in?

The answer is simple! The woman goes where he wants her to go. Now the man may want to move to your church etc. but that has to be his choice. When you as a woman do not follow your husband and demand him to follow you, you tip the balance of leadership. If you want him to be a leader this is the first place you let him lead you. The best answer is to take it to prayer and allow God to tell him and then be willing to listen to his answer. You will never be sorry you let him be the leader. If you are a woman who seeks after the heart of God you will be willing to follow your husband to the ends of the earth!

4) The Blueprint for Marriage

Rebekah went to her husband And they called Rebekah, and said unto her, Wilt thou go with this man? And she said, I will go. Genesis 24:58 She left that entire life she knew to follow a promise to become a mother of many nations. She left her family in faith that God had led her to a man who would provide for her needs: spiritual, physical, and emotional needs.

Isaac is working in the field  And Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the eventide: and he lifted up his eyes, and saw, and, behold, the camels were coming. Genesis 24:63 Here is another example of your husband. He is working in the field of souls. He is a servant himself in the house of the Lord. He is busy about the Father’s business. He is not sitting idly by and doing nothing but he is provider for spiritual, physical and emotional needs. No my sister in the Lord, he is working in the kingdom. He is kingdom minded. He is working and learning to be a provider while he is waiting for God to show him who you are as his bride.

The Marriage And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she lighted off the camel. For she had said unto the servant, What man is this that walketh in the field to meet us? And the servant had said, It is my master: therefore she took a vail, and covered herself. And the servant told Isaac all things that he had done. And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. Genesis 23:64-67 

She followed him. He recognized her for her gifts. (There are things that we ask God to do, when praying for a spouse and then when we see those things being answered in that person we know that God is answering our prayers. I personally have asked God some specific things for my mate and I believe that He will answer those prayers if I am willing to wait on the promise!) She was modest!!!!! This is a huge deal! A woman entering into a biblical marriage will be modest. She will not be sensual, seductive in either her clothing or the way she presents herself. He took her as his wife. He didn’t have poor intentions. He was honorable towards her and did not lead her on. She became his confidant and comforter. They became each others life partner!

In conclusion, I pray that you have read this blog with an open heart and open mind. Key point to remember:

1) Seek God’s will in Prayer

2) Have a Servant’s Heart

3) Praying Man and Woman

4) Worship God with your answer

5) Seek Godly Counsel

6) Recognize spiritual fruit and gifts

7) Be willing to lead and to follow

8) Work in the field

9) Be modest in your person

10) Have honest intentions

11) Allow God to unfold your own love story!

Only The King

Only The King

“Then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the mouth of the burning fiery furnace, and spake, and said, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, ye servants of the most high God, come forth, and come hither. Then Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, came forth of the midst of the fire.” Daniel 3:26

In prayer yesterday the Lord led me to Daniel 3:10 and I continued to read through a familiar passage of scripture. The three Hebrew children were thrown in the fire because they refused to worship any other God but the one true God. I know this passage well and I am sure some of you know it well too, as many of us learned about them in Sunday School. As I read the passages there were a few different things that came to light that God began to show me and I want to share them with you…

1) The Hebrew boys weren’t kept from the fire

2) They had to walk in the fire but it did not harm them

3) The Lord walked with them in the fire

4) Those who threw them in the fire were killed

5) Only the King could call them out of the fire

6) The Hebrew boys were promoted in the Kingdom

The Fire~

1) No matter who you are in life you will face trials and tribulation and you will go through the fire. It is in the fire that we are refined and we are made over for the glory of the King. He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords and its true He could keep us from going through the fire but then we would not be strong in battle. We would be complacent and the enemy would be able to sneak into our camp because we would not have our guard and armor round about us. We will always go through some type of trial but you can either do it with the Lord or try and do it alone. But with the Lord He will keep you and trying to do it alone will more than likely result in another trip to the fire!

No Harm~

2) We have to walk in the fire but when we are there we have promise that He will never leave us or forsake us!

“Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.” Deuteronomy 31:6

The Hebrew children were put in the fire and yet they were not harmed. The Lord spoke to me awhile back in prayer and told me that, I would be in the fire but the fire would not harm me. Honestly I didn’t even think about the Hebrew boys, but God’s word is true and it never changes.

Not Alone~

3) We are not alone in the fire!

“Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonished, and rose up in haste, and spake, and said unto his counsellors, Did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire? They answered and said unto the king, True, O king. He answered and said, Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.” Daniel 3:24-25

The Son of God was with the Hebrew boys and He is with us too. His word shall never pass away and what was true for them, is true for me, and is true for you too! God is no respecter of persons and His word, His love, and His promises are for all of us! So just know that the fire you are in today, you are not alone...

Our Enemies~

4) The men who put the Hebrew boys in the fire died! God is going to avenge you! You don’t have to fight the battle! The battle is mine sayeth the Lord! The enemy has been defeated and death can’t hold Him down! You don’t have to avenge yourself when you have been done wrong. The Lord will fight for you! He will restore, heal, and deliver!!!!

Come Forth, and Come Hither~

5) This is the main point that God showed me in the scriptures… Come forth!!! Only the King can call you out of the fire… He didn’t put you there but He allowed it to happen. He didn’t take you out of the fire right away but He walked with you in the fire. And now He is the only one who can call you out of the fire! He knows exactly where you are because He is right there with you my friend! He allowed you to be there to teach you to become an overcomer. He is walking right beside you and He will never leave you! 

The King is calling me out of the fire! I had to be in the fire so He could make me over once more. I will be in the fire again in the future but today He has given me strength for the next trial. Every thing we go through is to help us through the next trial and to help someone else through their fire. We overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. We are overcomers in Jesus Christ! We have a choice to move forward and get better or to get bitter. There will always be a trial, and something we are to bare. We have a promise that He will be with us in the trial. I am ready for to come out of the fire… Listen to His voice because He will soon be calling you too!!!!

Promotion~

6) The Hebrew boys were rewarded for their faithfulness to the Lord. They went through the fire and they came out the other side victorious! When we too pass the test God promotes us in the spirit. We have a deeper understanding of the Lord and we know him more. He may promote you and elevate you when and where you least expect it. There is always a promotion when we pass the test and we can be rest assured that the Lord will always reward the faithful. We may have never heard of the Hebrew boys if they had bowed to an idol but we know their story because they stayed true to their God.

Conclusion~

I think they were scared. I think they doubted what God was doing. I think they prayed for God to send angels to deliver them. I think they wondered why they were walking in the fire. I think they talked to God in the fire and asked Him why He had let them go into the fire in the first place. I think they were human! The moral of the story is to trust God and even when we don’t know what He is doing to walk with Him in the fire. He will call you out to come forth! Then He will reward you with a blessing for your faithfulness! Keep walking forward!!!

What About The Splinter?

Either how canst thou say to thy brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when thou thyself beholdest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother's eye. Luke 6:42

Mesquite trees are one of the toughest trees known to man. They can reach up to 50 feet tall with a branch spread of 40 feet or more. Their thorns are as tough as nails. They are big and strong and they can also kill you… You can move the beam of the tree completely out of the ground. It can be totally removed and yet one small trace, a splinter can get in your hand etc. and kill you. The thorns are poisonous and it is the splinter that will kill you…

There seems to be a new trend in the church or is it really new? I think that it is just re-packaged and re-labeled as being godly. (You have a beam in your eye, so you can’t even talk about my splinter)

I rarely speak out on controversial matters because I feel that it is more important to try and spark people to be inspired to change. I only speak now because I have seen so many loved ones in the church hurt, myself included while sitting on a pew. This message isn’t to point fingers or to say I am better than you. On the contrary I know without a shadow of a doubt that I have failed God probably more and in worse ways than most of you who will read this blog. I am a failure, a sinner, a former backslider, and was once lost. I had a beam in my eye.

But… what about the splinter?

Now, I am free, a sinner saved by grace, on fire for God, and I have been found. There is a great divide in the church for people like me. I was raised in church and walked away for several years. Then when I came back home I was welcomed with open arms like the prodigal daughter. The welcome party was short lived. Then there was a wide assortment of criticisms. It broke my heart literally. To think that I was so on fire for God and I just wanted to please Him and here I was made to feel like I wasn’t good enough. That I would have to do penance and (16) hail Mary’s and then it just might be possible to be used of God. It may sound like I am being bitter or hateful but I am not I am only trying to share how hard it is for a person to come back to God while on display. There is an expectation placed on your shoulders to be the new perfect saint and it is hard to live up to. Sadly, I feel this is why so many backsliders do not come home. They can’t face the judgment. I am sharing this to be an eye-opener to the church not to be another person turning reverse criticism, what would be the point?

So what happens when a backslider feels so much criticism? What happens when you are ostracized by those who are supposed to love you? What happens when you are stumbling and about to fall? What happens when people sit back and say, “Look at what they are doing” they aren’t changed?

The answer is: They fall while sitting on the pew….

A friend told me recently that her pastor told her, “You can’t expect to be a 30 year saint in 2 years of coming back to God.” I don’t know why these words have spoken to me but they have resonated into my soul. The same is for me. I may have been raised in church but I walked away from God. I lived a life of sin to the fullest.  It has taken three years of constant consecration to God for Him to re-program my mind. Friends you can’t input that much sin into your life and expect that just because you came back to God that you won’t still be struggling. Give yourself a break and stop being so hard on yourself. It is a process and you will fail God once you get back into church. You will more than likely fail Him really bad and you will think that you can’t make it. Sadly, people will tell you that you can’t make it too.  

I am here as living proof that you too can make it!!!! I have learned the really hard way that not everyone is behind you. Not everyone is your friend. Not everyone sees the good in you and who you will become. But it is a lesson worth learning, so that you too do not become a splinter pointing at a beam in someone else’s eye. You can choose today this very moment to stop the cycle of disdain. You can stop the criticisms and begin to pray rather than judge the beam in another’s eye lest you grow a splinter that will become infected. A little leaven leaveneth a whole lump. So don't be a part of the lump be a part of restoration in the body! 

You set the tone and atmosphere for your life. You can change the world you live in by reaching out to those who are hurting. You too might be the next one to fall and you might need the same help up as your brother or sister.  Make the choice to change. When we truly become one body and change toward the love of Jesus, that is when we will be able to move toward revival. How can we truly love new people if we can’t love those who we know?

“If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?”

1 John 4:20

There is a splinter in the church and it is infecting the body. Just because you don’t have a beam in your eye, doesn't mean there isn't a problem. I want to point out in love that just because you sit on a pew and your sins aren’t as open as (mine or someone elses) remember pointing fingers at others doesn’t diminish your sin. Ouch that is strong language! Please note that I am not being a reverse-judge mentalist. I am only trying to point out some pitfalls that we have all been guilty to fall into these categories.

So what can us as church goers do to change how we treat others?

1)    Love our neighbor as ourselves (It really is the most important thing)

2)    Pray for our brother or sister when we see them in a pit

3)    Don’t put your brother or sister in a pit and cause them to fall

4)    Love our neighbor as ourselves

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.  For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.” Romans 8:1-4

We cannot put condemnation on those who are no longer walking after the flesh and who are now walking the Spirit. I am so grateful and humbled that the Lord saw fit to pull the beam out of my eye and am now missing an eye. I pray every day to reach for others in their pit so that they too can have the beam pulled out of their eye. I strive toward the mark of not letting a splinter fester into an infection within my own person. I choose to not spread the infection throughout the body of believers. Will I be perfect? No. I am only aware and with awareness bring the ability to be proactive to combat against the enemy of self. I choose to love in spite of fault. I choose daily examine my life for splinters. I pray this blog opens eyes not in judgment but in awareness! 

What’s Trust Got To Do With It?

What’s Trust Got To Do With It?

The struggle is real, learning to trust God to be God, to do all that He has said He will do. I have a dream, I have a vision, and I have a calling and you do too! I think you like me have let things from the past and often in the present daunt us away from our future. We speak, “How can I do it? Why would He choose me? I am not good enough. I have failed too much. I have somehow lost the promise because of my failure.”  We speak anti-trust when we allow it to become about what we can do, rather than what He can do in our lives.  I will tell you the truth if you think you can’t do it then you are absolutely correct!

YOU CAN’T DO IT!!!

I think that this is the hardest lesson that I have ever had to learn, “I CANNOT DO IT.” Ouch! That hurts! It may be the truest lesson because it is about learning to trust in the Lord with all of our hearts. We say we trust Him, but do we really?

 It is hard to walk in faith knowing and not seeing. But isn’t that the definition of faith?

“Now Faith is the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

We can quote it, we can read it, we can turn to it, we can believe it, but how can we live it?

At church a few weeks ago precious lady spoke into my life in Sunday school and brought forth a timely message. She spoke about Hope, Trust, and Faith. The Lord had been talking to me about trust and putting my confidence in Him all month. So when she spoke her words it was like they burrowed into my soul. It is not enough to trust God but we must also put our confidence in Him. I can trust that you may be a good person but I don’t have confidence in every good person to come through in my life. God is a God of confidence and we must allow our trust to become confidence in Him, for He will do what He said He will do.

 When you let Him order your steps and take Him out of the box we have put Him in in our minds, I think that is when He can truly blow our minds. I want to live a life with the Lord where my trust is without borders. How do we live without borders? We have to die daily to the cross. We have to pray the prayer not my will but thy will be done Lord Jesus. We have to say guide me Lord, order my steps Lord, show me Lord, and let me not be deceived Lord. He is our daily bread and He desires to be the center of our lives. I told a dear friend this week that God is a jealous God and He desires us more than we desire Him. He is leading us to a place of trust and understanding so that He can give us the best gifts. The best part is that if God never does it, if He never fulfills His promise, (which I don’t believe because He cannot lie), then you will have surrendered to a God who will love you unconditionally.

If you haven’t experienced the kind of love from God I am talking about you too can have it. It is a process it doesn’t happen overnight. Often you will fall into utter failure but it’s when He picks you up out of the pig pen of your mistakes that you will find His love. When you couldn’t get up by yourself, when you had no place else to go, when there was no way for you to be set free from your failures, that my friend is when you will find His love. I am not saying you have to fail to find His love, but I am saying when you fail He will be there to lift you up. It is when you realize that He really does give and take away and that lifts up and takes down, and that the Master of the universe is holding you in His arms, you will know love.

The Key Principles of Faith by Sis Martin:

1)   You have to have hope

2)   You have to know it’s not your own abilities

3)   You must be fully persuaded

I have a hope that surpasses all understanding. I now know that it is not my own abilities. I am fully persuaded that God will fulfill His promises in me. God has brought people into my life in the past few months to speak about my heart’s desires. He has spent the last month unraveling my mind and teaching me to trust Him. He led me to Proverbs 3 and I think I have read the chapter every day for a two weeks.

“Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.” Proverbs 3:5-7

You must first have faith in order to trust. You must then have trust in order to have confidence. With confidence you will seek after wisdom. With wisdom you gain understanding. All of these attributes must be born in prayer. The ultimate understanding is that no you cannot do it!!! It is God who does it all, but it is us who let’s God do it! 

The Day I Died...

The day I died…

I was praying a few weeks ago and God began to speak to me about a fish being caught on a hook, the flow of a river, and about a turtle crossing the road…

Fish:

He began to show me that there are hundreds, maybe thousands of fish in the water but that one fish is caught on the hook at just the right moment. This is how we are to be with fishing for men. He told the disciples that they would be fishers of men. He showed them how when they tried to get the fish on their own, in their own merit they failed. But when God told them to let down their net they had an overabundance and were filled to capacity. So the fisherman on the water gets that one fish at just that right moment, and it was his time to die. Jesus is leading each and every one of us to die at just the right moment. Everything is ordained of God and He knows just exactly when you are going to die. The first time you die, you die through the salvation process. This is the Death (Repentance), Burial (Baptism), and Resurrection (Holy Ghost) which is speaking in other tongues as the spirit gives the utterance. (Acts 2:4, Acts 2:38). When you died in salvation you died at just the moment God had ordained for you to die. If you haven’t experienced this kind of death then I encourage you to study the scriptures and see for yourself what I am telling you to be true. I would begin reading in the book of Acts because this is where the beginning of the church began after Jesus was resurrected on the cross.

Today, I am really talking about a different kind of death. I am talking about dying to self. We come to God we receive salvation but that really is only the very beginning of it all. We begin on a road a journey really and we have to learn to have a relationship with God for ourselves. We have to die to the old man and become a new creature in Him. This is a process and it happens slowly and steadily over time. The more we want of Him the more He will show us and then honestly the more He will require of us. He never takes something from us that He knows we are not ready to surrender. Every time you surrender to His calling and give up a part of yourself to Him, then the more you die a little more to your flesh.

We keep walking or flowing in the spirit until He leads us to our death….

The River:

God gave me a personal analogy of me flowing down a fast moving river. The push of the current was moving me forward and there was only one direction. In the river there were bumps and bruises along the way. I hit a tree stump, I hit some debris, and I bottomed out on the rocks. I was tossed to one side of the river and I even tried to grab onto a tree branch and hold on. Yet, I was still being pushed forward. One time I stood up and tried to walk backwards and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t go backwards. I tried and I fell and was still being pushed forward. I was wet, cold, and all alone but still the river has pushed me forward.

Then I went over the edge of the waterfall…

The day I died it hurt and I cried out to God, “Help me God!” And He did… He was at the bottom of the waterfall with His loving arms and He placed me in the river below. This new river is a gentle flow. It is not rough, it is not pushing, and I am not fighting against the current. Because this time I know I had to reach my death in order to flow freely in the river in the spirit. 

The river is our walk with God. We are flowing in the spirit when we are walking with Him. We often hit the rocks and we think we did something wrong even though we are flowing in the spirit and walking with the Lord, we forget how to trust Him, or we've never learned how to trust Him. The rocks and the trees are God’s way of trying to correct us back onto the flow of the river. He is teaching us to trust Him and that means we cannot hold onto the branch of the trees. Even if we try to keep holding on for as long as we can, the current is so strong it will rip us from the roots and keep moving us forward. We try to do it on our own so then we try and go back to what we once knew. We stand up in the river and move backwards and we stumble and we fall, instead of letting the river in the spirit wash away our past. So we walk in circles in the current, not moving forward and never making it to what was behind us.

All along the river He is speaking, “Trust me.” “Lean not to your own understanding.” “Ask for what you need.” “Seek me and you will find me.” “Knock and the door will be open.” He is a God of love and He will not force you to die to self. He might let you live in a whirlpool of your own making for a time but eventually you will die one way or another.

There are three ways you can die:

1)   A spiritual death where you walk away from God and never come back

2)   You can die willingly and submit to His will readily

3)   Or you can die at His hand (He forcefully takes it from you)

All three are choices that you choose for your life. You can choose to walk away and live a life without the spirit and nothing more will be required of you. You can die willingly and this is the best option because you choose straightway to set aside your past and the things of this world. Then there are the rest of us…

You pray the prayer, “not my will but thy will be done.” But you struggle and you fight the spirit because either you don’t understand it, or you are hard headed and think somehow you can live in two places. I am here to tell you, YOU CAN’T! Once you pray the prayer, “not my will.” You give up your rights and give over your free will to the Lord, and then that is when He orders your steps. I implore you to die the easy way!!! When the Lord causes you to die, well let’s just say it is not pleasant.

When I reached to the edge of a waterfall the current came crashing in and I couldn’t breathe. The force of the fall almost tore me in pieces but that my friends was the day I died…

There were parts of me that I thought had died but they hadn’t. I had hidden chains buried in my life as far back as my childhood. As I was falling I couldn’t see through the water to the other side and I was drowning. The Lord brought me to my death but really it was new life. It was the last of the onion peel of sin that had encamped round about me my whole life. I had to die to self, self-will, rebellion, hatefulness, lust, and all worldly desires. I thought I had given them up willingly but there were walls that were down and I was in the enemy’s camp. I was easy prey and had been deceived by an imaginary idea that wasn’t real in the least.

I would like to insert here at this point. You can be praying, fasting, and doing the Lord’s work and still fall prey to the enemy. The more you step out on faith then the more of a moving target you are for the enemy. I trusted the wrong people. I got too close to imaginary friends and it was used to my detriment. I am not making excuses, I am just saying that it matters who is in your life.  If your defenses are down and you trust too easily, you are prey for the enemy. If you are not praying the right prayers and even setting aside the feelings you feel in the spirit you will be sorry. Not everyone is your friend. Not everyone cares to help you. Not everyone sees the good you tried to do. I only admonish the most important thing in your life is who you let to influence your life.

God has used my pain and my failures to help others. He will use it the rest of my life. He used my pain to gut me to the very core of my being, and mostly to learn to never treat anyone how I have been treated. True love, loves someone whether they can ever love you back or if they will ever love you at all. It is caring for someone no matter how far they fall and be there with a hand to lift them out of the mire. I learned this lesson from someone who changed my life. Then God showed me what it really means to be loved when no one else loves you, when they have all turned their back on you. The ultimate love is from Jesus who is our Father. He died for my sins, failures, pains, and broken hearts.

I found myself back on the threshing floor and God met me like He has never met me before in my life. He unraveled the unspoken parts of my life I didn’t even know existed. So as I am not glad that I failed God, I am glad He finally was able to show me the holes in my armor. This was the day I died. I was the fish on the hook and at the exact moment ordained of God, He changed me and transformed me once more for His glory.

Turtle:

God knows when the turtle crosses the road. He knows where the ants store up food. When the bird will soar in the sky and just when His promises will come to pass. If God knows the exact moment things are to happen for animals and bugs, how much more does He know and order our steps? This is something God has been teaching me in the lesson. He has been teaching me to trust and know that if He says it will happen, that means it has already happened. He is a God who lives in the future, our future! He lives beyond the present and takes our past and uses it for His glory.

This has been hard for me to understand. I have stepped out in faith and then I got waylaid. I have doubted that what I had heard from God was really from God. I know we have all been there. I would like to say at this point that the devil is a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. His tricks are all the same. He uses the same ploys over and over. “If it hasn’t happened by now, then it will never happen.” “You aren’t good enough.” “You have failed too much for God to use you.” “No one likes you.” “No one wants to hear what you have to say.” “You’re not worth the effort.” “You will never do what God has told you.” These ARE ALL LIES!!!! He uses them most effectively when we are weak, discouraged, and forlorn but they are still lies.

I asked the Lord once, “Lord, I have failed you so much, how could you love me? How could you use me when I have failed you so much?” He answered, “But I saw your love in the future and I carried you to this point. You will use your testimony to give me glory. You will speak life to the broken, and you will lead them to the cross.” Needless to say I was overcome by so much love. If Jesus the God of all creation who died for my salvation could forgive me and use me, then how much more am I to love and forgive? I don’t care who you are, what you have done, or where you have been, you have a place in the Kingdom. You have a place as my friend. I will pray for you, love you, and help you to the cross.

 "Does God really have His hand on me?" 

So in answer to the age old question, If God has his hand on the turtle, then He has His hand on your life too…

Conclusion:

I pray that this blog blessed you somehow. I pray that you too can die to self and that you die willingly…

You are a fish that is being kept until just the moment when God will change you. He is leading you down a river and teaching you to trust Him when all things seem impossible. You are more important than a turtle. He cares for the turtle crossing the road and the birds in the air; but He cares more about you in your journey. He is ordering your steps. He knows where you are and He will never leave you or forsake you! Trust HIM! Don’t let the lies of the enemy destroy you! Don’t let your past dictate your future! Remember to forgive along the journey and be willing to welcome those home who have fallen by the wayside. If you have been forgiven then you too must forgive! The ultimate story of love and forgiveness is Jesus our Master, Savior, Redeemer, and Healer… Share your own story of love and let’s lead as many people to the cross and back to the cross as possible…You have the power to change lives for the good and the bad. What is your choice?

Unplugging the Drain..

Unplugging the Drain…

How many times have you had to unclog your sink drain? I think it has happened to us all at one time or another. Then there was that one time you got down on your hands and knees in the tub and it seemed you pulled and pulled at all the junk clogging your drain. You might have found rocks, dirt, hair, and “oh my” yes, you found some pennies. Is it any wonder the water cannot flow freely down the drain? 

The Lord gave me a scripture in prayer a few days ago:

“He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.” John 7:38

The Lord reminded me of Jonah and how he was in the belly of the whale. He was in the belly for three long days… He was in with the waste, undigested food, and foul smells. Jonah had to die to self in the belly of that whale! Just as we have to die to ourselves in order to be raised up again. I am talking about salvation but I am also talking about dying to self-will so that God can use us to our full potential. 

“For as Jonah was three days and three nights in the belly of the great fish, so will the Son of Man be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth. The men of Nineveh will rise up in the judgment with this generation and condemn it, because they repented at the preaching of Jonah; and indeed a greater than Jonah is here.” (Matthew 12:40-41)

God was making him over and re-shaping Jonah for his purpose to preach to Ninevah. You cannot run from God because no matter where you are, He will find you! 

Out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water… 

You have to come out of the belly to live and to flow in the spirit. God has put me in the belly of the whale. I have failed Him and I have come before Him wanting. It is dark, it is lonely, it is smelly, it is foul, it is painful, it is rejection, it is fear, it is doubt, it is travail, it is anguish, but it is necessary. 

How can you flow with living water if you have dead things living inside of you? I tell you, you cannot! You might not even know they are there but the enemy knows just when to pounce on you in the most obscure moments. You think you are where you need to be but God is digging in your drain and He is finding dirt, hair, and pennies. He is digging to the core of your being. He wants all of you! He wants ultimate surrender. 

He wants to get you from whom you thought you were to who you are to become!

Then the Lord showed me unless I had gone through the belly of the whale I would never be able to be used to my full potential. The junk buried in my life from a small girl has kept me from advancing in Him. You see my friend even if you don’t know you are sinning, sin is what separates us from the love of God. It is what keeps us from seeing the supernatural in our walk with God. I implore you to ask God to search you the easy way and let Him show you your faults. I promise you that it is a painful journey to be in the belly. 

Out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water…

Now, once you are out of the whale’s belly and you surrender the rivers of living water can flow freely. There will be liberty but there is a cost for that liberty. You must be willing to put all your eggs in one basket: The basket of the calling of the Lord. Are you willing to sell out to see other’s lives changed? Will you be willing to sacrifice so others do not spend an eternity in Hell? I know this is strong language but it is necessary. I have been sifted, I have been found wanting, but I am also an overcomer for the Gospel. 

Who am I?

I am a child of the King, daughter, forgiven, redeemed, called out for a purpose, holding the rod of authority, chosen, loved, apostle, lover of souls, and so much more….

It really isn’t about me. But it is me trying to inspire you to take your life to the next level:

1) Search me Lord show me my hidden sin

2) Daily dedicated prayer (sacrificial prayer)

3) Daily reading searching out the scriptures

4) Fasting (one day weekly)

5) Tithing (10%)

6) Faithful to the House of the Lord

7) Reaching for the Lost

8) Helping the homeless, widows, orphans, the least of these Matthew 25

I would like to encourage you to pray Ephesians 6 by putting on the armor of God each day before you leave your home. I would like to encourage you to pray in the morning even if you just start with five minutes. Be on the offensive in prayer and take the enemy by storm. 

“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” Ephesians 6:12 

God commands everything and He is in control! You must go through the belly of the whale to get all the junk out of your life. Jesus spent three days in the tomb; He did so to save us from our sins. We too must die to self to be saved from our sins! 

You must unplug the drain in your life so that the water can flow freely. Then a well of living water will spring up and carry you to newer heights in the Lord. He will be able to free you from the debris of the junk so that He is able to do what He has called you to do in your life! 

Salvation Message:

John 3:5 (Jesus’ command)

Acts 2:38 (Peter telling the people how to be saved)

You too can be saved… He is reaching for you and He is calling you out of the whale of the belly of life… Feel free to contact me for more information :)