Are you ready to embark on a journey? Have you ever wondered
how it is supposed to work? What does the bible have to say about a biblical
marriage? And is it really that important? These are the questions I am going
to attempt to answer in this blog. I have stewed on this subject for over a
year. I have studied it in the Word and have had God give me insight into His
perfect plan for marriage. So come take a walk with me as we begin our story of
a young woman named Rebekah.
The story of Isaac and Rebekah is a familiar story to most.
I want to emphasize that although I am going to lay out a biblical marriage
blueprint for us in the physical it is also a typology of our marriage to God
as the bride of Christ. Every reflection of marriage and even the reason why
God made marriage is so that we could understand what it means to be married to
God. I will touch on that some but truly I want to lay out a blueprint of Gods
plan for our lives.
There are so many things going on in today’s society and the
media. But, how do we as single Christians find our Isaac or Rebekah? With the
alarming divorce rate in and out of the church, should we even bother looking? I
am sure this is how Rebekah felt so long ago.
1) A servant’s heart
And the servant put his hand under the thigh of
Abraham his master, and sware to him concerning that matter…And he said O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good
speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. Genesis
24:9,12
Man: The servant of Abraham is a
type and shadow of the man today who is serving his master (Jesus). He prayed
to God and asked God to show him who Isaac’s wife would be just as a man of God
will pray and ask God to show him who his wife is today. He will be a servant
of the Lord. (As most of us do not have a manservant to go and find us a wife.)
Here we can also note that the man
is the one who went in search of his bride. Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Proverbs 18:22
Ladies as much as we might want to pursue a husband it just isn’t in the
plan of God. We have to let them find us! This is ever a hard lesson to learn
and sadly most do not. In a world where roles are reversed and identities are confused
this is hard to have faith that the man will actually find us. Reminds me of a
quote I saw one time, “My knight isn’t on a horse, he’s lost in the woods on a
turtle.” Well he may be “lost” but it’s not our job to find him. We can only
pursue him in prayer. God will reward you but you will have to wait for the
promise.
He is a praying man! He will also pursue you in prayer! If
he isn’t praying for you now, why would you waste your time on a façade of a
promise?
And he said O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good
speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham.
Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the
daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water:
And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I
shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall
say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that
thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou
hast shewed kindness unto my master. Genesis 24:12-14
Woman: A woman must also be a servant like Rebekah was on
that day. How many days had she willingly gone to the well to draw water? I am
sure she was tired after the long walk in the desert that day. It was hard work
to lift the water jug down into the well. I wonder how often she thought that
God had forgotten her. I don’t think there is a single woman alive in church
who hasn’t thought this before. We see here that she served and her decision to
serve a stranger opened the door to her heart’s desire.
And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin,
neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her
pitcher, and came up. And the
servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of
thy pitcher. And she said,
Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and
gave him drink. And when she had done
giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also, until they
have done drinking. And she hasted, and
emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water,
and drew for all his camels.
Genesis 24:16-20
If you are lacking direction in
your life and you don’t know how God will ever bring you your mate, I implore
you to choose to be a servant. Be a servant on your job. Be a servant at your
church. Be a servant to your pastor. Be a servant to your family. Be a servant
to your community. The key to God opening doors in your life is to be a willing
servant. Serve with no expectation of recognition. Serve with a heart of
worship. Serve the least of the Kingdom in love. Don’t serve with the idea of
if I serve God will bring me my man! No, a servant serves and because they
serve they are rewarded not because it’s their duty but because it is in their
heart to help others.
2) A Praying Man and Woman
There are two times the servant
prays in this story. He prays for guidance and then he worships God for
answering his prayer.
And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray
thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in? And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son
of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor. She
said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to
lodge in. And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the Lord. Genesis 24:23-26
Ladies~ your husband is a prayer
warrior! He is seeking God for you hand in marriage! He is worshipping at home
and he is worshipping in church. He is putting God first in all He does. He is
seeking to honor you with his attentions. His purpose is to lead you closer to
Jesus. He is not seeking you in secret. He is not asking you to compromise your
morals or your virtue. He is looking to provide you with the very best he has
to offer! Do not be fooled by those who are wolves in sheep’s clothing. Your
husband will be upfront and clear with his intentions. He will have sought
godly council from his leaders and have fasted and prayed.
Men~ your wife will have the fruit
of the spirit and be adorned in godly jewels. The servant of the Lord will have
placed them upon her life. She will be a testament of beauty and grace.
And it came to pass, when he saw the earring and
bracelets upon his sister's hands, and when he heard the words of Rebekah his
sister, saying, Thus spake the man unto me; that he came unto the man; and,
behold, he stood by the camels at the well. Genesis 24:30
She will have the gifts of the
spirit operating in her life. She will be a prayer warrior. She will be evident
of who she is in God and she will be a testament of God working in her life.
She will be set apart seeking God first in her life, a servant seeking to
please even the lowliest of strangers.
3) The Blessings of Counsel
Both will seek godly counsel. The
man will make his intentions known. The woman will tell her family and loved
ones and seek approval. It can never be the will of God to not include your
pastor, your family, and loved ones in your life’s decision. This will bring
the blessings of the Lord on your life. You will begin life together the right
way and not in shame. There is no hurry! You don’t have to run away together
and elope. You don’t have to marry in secret! The blessing of your family and
church family is the best plan. I know there are circumstances that don’t allow
this and there are always situations of unsaved family not welcoming your
marriage but the part you have to play is including them even if in your circumstance
they don’t like your proposed spouse. The point is you asked for the blessing
and you did your due diligence to go through all the right channels.
And now if ye will deal kindly and truly with my
master, tell me: and if not, tell me; that I may turn to the right hand, or to
the left. Then Laban and Bethuel
answered and said, The thing proceedeth from the Lord:
we cannot speak unto thee bad or good. Behold,
Rebekah is before thee, take her, and go, and let her be thy master's son's
wife, as the Lord hath spoken. Genesis 24:49-51
Rebekah was a blessing as she went
and followed her husband. The woman goes to the man! I know this point might
not be popular but it’s a valid point. The woman should always follow the man.
When it comes to, where do we live? Whose church do we go to? Which state
should we live in?
The answer is simple! The woman
goes where he wants her to go. Now the man may want to move to your church etc.
but that has to be his choice. When you as a woman do not follow your husband
and demand him to follow you, you tip the balance of leadership. If you want him
to be a leader this is the first place you let him lead you. The best answer is
to take it to prayer and allow God to tell him and then be willing to listen to
his answer. You will never be sorry you let him be the leader. If you are a
woman who seeks after the heart of God you will be willing to follow your
husband to the ends of the earth!
4) The Blueprint for Marriage
Rebekah went to her husband
And they called Rebekah, and said unto her, Wilt thou
go with this man? And she said, I will go. Genesis 24:58 She
left that entire life she knew to follow a promise to become a mother of many
nations. She left her family in faith that God had led her to a man who would
provide for her needs: spiritual, physical, and emotional needs.
Isaac is working in the field And Isaac
went out to meditate in the field at the eventide: and he lifted up his eyes,
and saw, and, behold, the camels were coming. Genesis 24:63 Here
is another example of your husband. He is working in the field of souls. He is
a servant himself in the house of the Lord. He is busy about the Father’s
business. He is not sitting idly by and doing nothing but he is provider for spiritual,
physical and emotional needs. No my sister in the Lord, he is working in the kingdom.
He is kingdom minded. He is working and learning to be a provider while he is
waiting for God to show him who you are as his bride.
The Marriage And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw
Isaac, she lighted off the camel. For she had
said unto the servant, What man is this that walketh in the field to meet us?
And the servant had said, It is my master: therefore she took a vail, and
covered herself. And the servant told
Isaac all things that he had done. And
Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and took Rebekah, and she
became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.
Genesis 23:64-67
She followed him. He recognized
her for her gifts. (There are things that we ask God to do, when praying for a
spouse and then when we see those things being answered in that person we know
that God is answering our prayers. I personally have asked God some specific
things for my mate and I believe that He will answer those prayers if I am
willing to wait on the promise!) She was modest!!!!! This is a huge deal! A
woman entering into a biblical marriage will be modest. She will not be
sensual, seductive in either her clothing or the way she presents herself. He
took her as his wife. He didn’t have poor intentions. He was honorable towards
her and did not lead her on. She became his confidant and comforter. They
became each others life partner!
In conclusion, I pray that you
have read this blog with an open heart and open mind. Key point to remember:
1) Seek God’s will in Prayer
2) Have a Servant’s Heart
3) Praying Man and Woman
4) Worship God with your answer
5) Seek Godly Counsel
6) Recognize spiritual fruit and
gifts
7) Be willing to lead and to follow
8) Work in the field
9) Be modest in your person
10) Have honest intentions
11) Allow God to unfold your own love story!
